If things start happening, don’t worry, don’t stew, just go right along and you’ll start happening too.
If things start happening, don’t worry, don’t stew, just go right along and you’ll start happening too.
Do you have parenting idols? People you aspire to be more like? People who seem to have this parenting this down, who never set a foot wrong, who seem to be sailing through without a care in the world? I have……….or should I say I did! There is this lovely mama who I kept wishing I could be more like. We’ve been corresponding a lot via emails and we have met a few times (we know her husband). She has given me a lot of advice over certain things regarding which wraps were good ones to get when I was looking for a woven, how to deal with a high needs baby, what cream to try to soothe my skin when the candida bacteria started attacking my epidermis and it looked like I would have to give up breastfeeding as I was in total agony. I wished and prayed I could be like her, unphased, calm, enjoying parenthood to the max (don’t get me wrong I LOVE it, but she just seemed to love it that little bit more!). She’s a cloth diapering, AP parent who seemed to be making super healthy choices for her children. I also make healthy choices (and today found out just how much). I don’t let my daughter eat many sugary things due to the issues I have and looking back I know without a doubt my high sugar diet from childhood has left me in the mess I’m fighting so hard to get out of and I do not want that for her. But as I was planning my daughter’s party, I kept wondering about the food choices thinking oh my goodness I bet she doesn’t let her boys eat this, or will she be tut tutting at the fact that some of the sandwiches are made on white bread?! Silly things, but yeah, they were big concerns in my head. Some days I would feel I was an unfit mother. I wasn’t giving enough of myself to my daughter, I wasn’t gentle enough, I wasn’t patient enough(this mama seems to have patience in abundance!). It got me down. It got me wondering why God has made me a mother when really, I wasn’t so cut out for this job and other people were giving their children so much more.
Today, we met up in the city as she and her family were over this way for work related purposes. She suggested eating lunch at Pizza Hut………….never did I think she would eat in a place like that as I had epitomised her as this super healthy person who wouldn’t want to be that junk into her children. Well, my eyes and ears were opened over that lunch table: her boys get squash to drink………..I only ever allow Miss E water and when she does come to have anything else it will be milk first and then 100% organic fruit juice watered down. Her oldest son who is nearly toilet trained wears a ‘sposie at nighttime……….never thought I’d hear her say she put anything but cloth on their bottoms. Not only did the boys have pizza, they got a HUGE bowl of ice cream filled with candy(and they’d already been taken to a candy store earlier in the day)to feast upon. She and her husband drank about 3 huge pepsi max’s each while I sat there with my water. They opted for a delayed vaccination schedule and we opted out completely. They still see the HV but wish they didn’t, whereas I sent the one here packing from the start and refuse to have anything to do with their optional service. Those are just for starters. I also had her in my mind as this calm, genteel mother who always spoke in quiet measured tones…wrong!
Lessons I learned today: Free yourself from the trap of trying to be more like someone else. Things aren’t always what they seem! Don’t build someone else up to be something they aren’t. Don’t think someone else is better than you at this parenting business. Give thanks to God for the parent He has made you and only look to Him as the epitome of what a good parent is and strive to be more like Him not like anyone else. he has made you as you are for the purpose that only you can fulfil and only YOU can parent your children…..otherwise some other mother and father would be parenting them and you wouldn’t have them. And……….give yourself a break! You are doing just fine mum or dad, just fine 🙂 Keep up the good work!
A few weeks back I reblogged a post about making your own tree blocks for open ended imaginative play and said we might have a got at making some. And we did! A few weekends ago we collected some fallen tree branches while out on a walk and left them to dry out in our porch. This weekend, my husband kindly sawed some of them into tree blocks(we still have a few more of wider diameters to create with). Here they are waiting to have all their sharp sawn edges sanded off.
I’m looking forward to these being played with for many years to come. Have you made any DIY kids toys recently? Please share your ideas if you have. If you decide to have a go at making these take your child’s personality into account….if they still like to investigate everything by mouth then small tree blocks would be unadviseable.
I hate piles of toys. I hate piles of mindless toys. I dislike toys that don’t serve some form of educational purpose. Toys, in my mind, should serve some purpose of enhancing the mind of a child and not merely entertain a child. With Christmas and birthdays come lots of gifts and those gifts need a home. I like my daughters toys to be set out so she can see what she has and in such a way that each toy has a home that it comes out of to be played with and returns to when not in use. I found a lovely bargain shabby sheek upcycled bookcase on gumtree which my lovely husband bought for me and I’ve been happily giving a home to some of my daughter’s toys. I love it and things look a lot neater on the toy front now hurrah! Thank you dear husband!!
Can you tell we really like our wooden toys in this house? 🙂
On Saturday we had your Very Hungry Caterpillar Party. Your Tiny Talk teacher did a session at the party filled with your favourite songs and actions and she read the story complete with signs. There was then a time for playing with your friends while the food got ready. We sang happy birthday to you and blew out the candle on your cake. You helped yourself to icing from the cupcake on the top 🙂 You enjoyed stealing food from your guests. Everyone enjoyed themselves.
On Sunday you opened the presents from all your little friends and we took the dogs on a long walk.
On your birthday you opened your presents from us and the rest of your family. We went to your Tiny Talk class. You enjoyed having Daddy there. It was his first time being able to come to one of our classes. On our way home we went to White Post Farm. We got some cheap annual passes when they had a deal on and you love visiting the animals. Maybe one day you will be able to have the small holding Mummy always dreamed of or be the vet Mummy always wanted to be 🙂
On all three days you went to bed a very tired but very happy little girl. Thank you for letting us share the excitement of your celebrations with you.
Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.
~John Trainer M.D.~
Monday was your birthday. You are now one. Where has the time gone? It feels like I have just blinked and you’ve gone from dependant newborn to emerging independent individual. You have accomplished so much in your 12 months. You have gone from an extremely high needs baby to one that’s learned with our support to be happy without constant contact for small amounts of time. We never pushed you to be anything other than what you were. When you needed us we were there and we still are. I was there to nurse and rock you to sleep and Daddy would help rock you to sleep if you woke up until the day you let us know you were happy to go to bed and fall asleep by yourself. Every night I kiss you goodnight and walk over to turn the light off, I look at you watching me peacefully and I know we’ve come so far.
We didn’t get off to the best of starts. From a horrible pregnancy where I couldn’t really bond with you to collapsing twice just after you were born to being bed ridden for a good few months after you were born and not being able to give you the time you deserved, I feel so guilty that I have let you down so much already. I wish I could go back and relive those months with my current better health. I am so thankful for our breastfeeding bond. I was determined to breastfeed before you were born despite the lack of support I received from most people outside of your Daddy. It was the one thing that no one else could do for you and no matter how ill I have felt I have pushed to ensure you are breastfed. It hasn’t been easy, but there is no other choice I would’ve made for you or me. It had been suggested by those who don’t understand what we have that it’d be easier to give you formula given my health. These people fail to realise that breastfeeding is about more than nourishing your body; it nourishes your soul as well and is the one thing that we share that no one else can enter into; one area in which I haven’t failed you. I am pleased to say that a year later and I am still able to provide you with that bond. Happy Feeding Birthday to us as well my sweetheart!
I cannot thank you enough for all the good change you have wrought in my life. Without you I never would have gotten to the point physically of finally getting some answers about why I was constantly so poorly. Without you, I would never have gained the confidence to try out new things without the fear of failure. Without you, I never would have started this blog. Without you, I never would have called into question a lot of what is considered normal in society around me to examine it closely and see if it really was in your best interests. Without you, I wouldn’t have reason to go out and meet new people. Without you my life was grey and boring.
With you, my life is full of colour. With you my life is filled with laughter. With you my life is never dull. With you my life is filled with promise and new beginnings.
Thank you for teaching me patience and being forgiving of me every time I mess up. Thank you for teaching me to be less self-centred even though I still have a long way to go. Thank you for giving me a reason to get up in the morning and face each new day with a smile. Thank you for all the hugs and kisses we have shared.
This year has been so filled with changes, and you have done a lot of changing and growing my beautiful butterfly. You have teeth, you sit up, you pull yourself up, you crawl, you cruise, you talk, you feed yourself, you have preferences of what you like to do and where you like to go, you delight in animals, you love lights, all kinds of lights, you enjoying looking at and talking about the world map or ‘bap’ in our hallway, you love turning the lights on and off yourself, you love listening to stories, you enjoy watching other people, you love a good game of peek-a-boo, you want to know the name for everything you see, you try to repeat words you hear, you enjoy dancing to music and playing with your instrument set(will this continue as you get older?), you love shapes, you love all types of bean and lentils, you hate meat, you eat an adult sized portion of porridge for breakfast and sometimes you are still so hungry you eat half of mine as well.
These are just some little snippets of your first year my sweet angel. It has been a full and happy year packed with lots of love and laughter. I am excited to watch you grow and develop even more into your own little person. I thank God for the blessing of you in my life, and you truly are a blessing, my miracle baby. There are no words to express just how much I love you.
Always remember no matter how old you get or where you are in this world or what you do, you will always be my baby.
Happy Birthday Darling Girl!!
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