Tag Archives: reflexology

Our Rainbow Came To Join Us

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So, our rainbow baby has arrived, and she’s now almost 3 months old, but better late than never to record the birth story ūüôā ¬†From the beginning my envisaged birth was a water birth at home with just my husband and eldest daughter present. ¬†I awoke at 4am on the morning of her birth with a knowing feeling that it would be the day. ¬†Once again, it was a weekend, so Mr P was at home. ¬† We went about our day. ¬†Miss E was rather tired, so she went for a nap and we stayed home from church. ¬†I lay in bed most of the morning. ¬†Around 10:30 am I got the odd surge but they averaged about 2-3 an hour from then. ¬†At 11:30 am, I came downstairs to tell Mr P it was time to fill the pool as we would be having the baby that day. ¬†He was rather dubious due to the fact I was extremely calm and didn’t seem to be in labour, but he did as instructed. ¬†By lunchtime I decided it was the right time to call my reflexologist for a treatment. ¬†She arrived around 1:45pm and gave me a treatment. ¬†Things were still very chilled out at this point. ¬†She left again about 3pm saying to go lie down and rest and she felt by 10pm the baby would be here. ¬†After she left, I told Mr P that I didn’t think it was going to take that long and I thought by 7pm baby would be here and Miss E would still be up. ¬†I went to lie down as I felt quite tired. ¬†Through this time Mr P and Miss E had gone to the shops for something we were out of, sorted our dinner which was cooking and smelling delicious and picked blackberries from the garden. ¬†By 4pm, I couldn’t lie down anymore as my body was telling me to stay upright, so I paced around the upstairs listening to some music, swaying back and forth while Miss E and Mr P played in the garden. ¬†Mr P came in around 4:40pm to get the rest of dinner ready. ¬†I told him I was ¬†heading to the shower for some heat therapy as my back was a little painful then. ¬†By now the surges had been coming quickly for an hour, so I knew we had hit active labour stage, but everything was still very calm. ¬†I came downstairs at 5pm in time for dinner, and Miss E had hurt herself, so I gave her a cuddle. ¬†When I set her down again and stood up, I had one very sharp intense pain, and I said to Mr P that it was time for me to get in the pool and to bring me dinner after he and Miss E were finished. ¬†So while they ate, I breathed in my essential oils and listened to my music. ¬†He brought me my dinner and I was so looking forward to eating that lamb curry, but as soon as I had the plate in my hand the intensity of the contractions increased and they came one on top of another, so i never got to eat more than 3 bites, as every time I tried to eat a mouthful, I’d have to hand everything back to Mr P so I could sway in the water. ¬†I gave up in the end and asked him to start the cd again, get more oils in my burner, and also to remain by the pool. ¬†Miss E was also there. ¬†About 6pm, I had 5 intense surges that made me cry a little and think I couldn’t do anymore without relying on some gas and air and only one person could get me that; and my dreams of my unassisted birth seemed to be slipping away, so, feeling rather defeated, I asked Mr P to call for the midwife. ¬†I now know those 5 surges and little cry was my transition phase. ¬†While Mr P was on the phone I knew the baby was coming and would be born as I had always envisaged. ¬†At 6:16pm, surrounded by the love of her closest family and born into an environment of peace, calm, safety, and familiarity, Miss K entered the world easily weighing a healthy 10 lb 1, and I delivered her and lifted her from the water myself. ¬†Nothing can describe the feeling of birthing your child alone and being the first to lay hands on them. ¬†It was the most natural experience and just as nature intended. ¬†I also gave my firstborn the gift I so wanted to bestow upon her; the gift of seeing firsthand that birth is a natural and normal occurrence, not a medical procedure, and when you focus on the right things, surges are not painful, your body relaxes and births can be an enjoyable and empowering experience. ¬†I have thoroughly enjoyed both my births, and I am so thankful to God to have been in much better health this time round and to have learned so much from both births. ¬†Hopefully, I can put what I have learned to good use in future. ¬†I praise God for the safe arrival of Miss K to our family, and for the wonderful gifts she will bring to our family as she grows and reveals more of who she is.

 

SAMSUNG CSC

SAMSUNG CSC

She Motivates Me

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My daughter means the world to me. ¬†I do a lot for her, but she does a lot on return for me. ¬†One of those things being the motivation she gives me. ¬†As I’ve mentioned before, I had to step out of my practitioners diploma in Reflexology while pregnant and once I became well enough to start again there were very obstacles to overcome with the college and awarding body. ¬†Those were sorted and in January I wrote how I was determined to finish this thing this year even though I have been given til 2015. ¬†Well, I was all set to start studies again in the New Year and I had done when yet another obstacle came my way via email from the college. ¬†I was so demotivated and I didn’t even care anymore. ¬†In fact, I had said to my husband I’m finished. ¬†I’m not bothered about becoming a clinical Reflexologist because I am never going to go into practice(seeing that we are planning on continuing our daughter’s education at home once she reaches compulsory school age), there’s always one thing after another that happens, and it’s caused me to lose heart and interest in the whole thing. ¬†I had given up; I had decided that was that. ¬†A little while after making this decision, I was looking at my daughter and I was reminded that I didn’t go in to the training hoping to set up a thriving practice, I went in to train so I could help my family as it had helped me so much. ¬†I don’t need to go into practice to be of help to my family at the end. ¬†I also thought of what kind of example am I setting her? ¬†In the future, when we talk about it and how I started but then gave up because I lost heart and interest due to the obstacles that came……..would I feel proud of saying that to her? ¬†Or would I feel better giving her the example that yes, it was hard; yes, there were obstacles, yes, I wanted to quit, but I kept going to the end. ¬†I finished what I started and I achieved something. ¬†I know I want my example to be the latter. ¬†I want her to know that if she has a dream she can get past the hurdles and get to the finish line. ¬†The path from a to B might not be straightforward or as first imagined, but it’s still possible to arrive at B. ¬†That’s what I want her to know, and I want her to know the sense of satisfaction that comes from achieving what you set out to achieve. ¬†So, with her as my motivation and God as my strength, I WILL finish this diploma. ¬†I WILL realise my dream. ¬†I WILL soon be a clinical reflexologist, and I WILL use it to help those in need as I have been helped with it.

A Gift From Above

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That’s what good news is.¬† It breaks through the mundane, the worry, the despair, the frustration and gives us a lift and reminds us that God’s still in our corner and still seeking the best for us in our lives.¬† This past week has brought a few nuggets of good news my way.¬† I posted back in July about how it looked like I wouldn’t get to finish my Diploma in Reflexology (you can read about it here) and that¬†I also stood to lose all the money I had invested.¬† I had no idea why God allowed things to work out as they did, but I had to trust that He knew best and that either I’d get to finish the diploma somehow or that He just didn’t want me to do it.¬† I decided the best course of action was to write a letter to the college expressing my disappointment and noting the ways in which I felt¬†they had breeched their contract with me etc.¬† On Monday I got the news that¬†I could either defer another year until September 2013 and start all over again and not pay a single penny extra.¬† It sounds like a great plan, because my daughter will be older and less dependant on me, but at the same time, who knows where we will be by 2013 location wise and I may have another cherub to care for which would complicate the whole situation further.¬† His second solution was that he contacted the old awarding body(the one I was studying under til he switched for this academic year)and they are happy to allow me to continue working on the syllabus I was on and at my own time to receive the diploma I should have received this June.¬† He has said that as I pick things up easily I don’t even need to attend any classes.¬†¬†I can work from all the class material and podcasts at home and just come to the bits of the new course that interest me and for the practical bits if I want to brush up my skills.¬† This works brilliantly with my current situation.¬† I can work from home, in my own time.¬† It doesn’t impinge upon time with my baby girl, and if I do go to some of the sessions I won’t be gone from early morning til late at night.¬† Also, it’s up to me how slowly or quickly I complete the course.¬† I am so thrilled I can continue, and now I see that God wasn’t saying no…He was just fixing the situation that should have been to make it suit me even better.¬† Praise Him!¬† I am already thinking about which direction to take my CPD training in once I’m finished as I want to focus on certain areas such as fertility/maternity and babies/young children.¬†¬†The excitement is making me get carried away.

Another bit of good news that came to me is that my best friend and her family will be moving to within 2 hours of where I live.¬† Since 2004 we have lived in separate countries and it’s been tough as neither of us has found another friend who hears our heart in quite the same way (besides our husbands obviously, but there are times when you just need a female to talk to!).¬† She and her husband were due to move to another area a few years back and came to look for housing and we met up with them thrilled at the prospect that they might be nearer, but then God said no at that time.¬† It looked like they may not get this time as my friend has been so ill since the birth of her daughter, baby number 2, but she started making dietry changes like I had to do and is improving, so they have just signed on a house over here and will be moving in a few weeks.¬† I am delighted to have a dear friend living so close by, as I have felt quite isolated at times.¬† Sure, I have friends and am friendly with people, but you cannot bare your sole to everyone; for that you need a special friend.¬† I’m also excited to see our daughters playing together as they are only a few weeks apart age wise, so it’ll be great fun to have play dates.

All in all, a great week for good news and the balm my heart needed to lift it and make it lighter.  Thank you, Lord for your goodness to us.

The Hard Road of Pregnancy

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finally posing for the camera

Amazing to see a glimpse of a new life being formed ūüôā

 

Before becoming pregnant, I had these¬†romantic ideas¬†of what it would be like to have a little life growing inside, of the wonder and joy, of the deep bond that would form with this person who was part of you….my experience, however, was far removed from those ideas!

The first week and a half after we found out was great.¬† We were excited and elated as would anyone in our situation be who had just been handed such a blessing from God after being given no human medical hope of conceiving naturally.¬† But like a tornado ripping through a town, my life changed in an instant.¬† I was ridiculously sick.¬†¬†I couldn’t keep any food or drink down without the help of medication and even then the amount that stayed down was minimal.¬† I needed help to get out of bed and help to get washed etc.¬† I had read about “morning” sickness but this was beyond¬†the textbook case of morning sickness even at its worst!¬† I tried all the remedies, sea bands, ginger, sniffing lemons, flat coke,¬†you name it I tried it on top of the¬†pills that were already supposed to be stopping me from¬†being¬†sick all day long!¬† I was never without a bucket.¬† The only thing that gave me any relief was my reflexology treatment every other week.¬† It helped rebalance all the hormones and I’d get about 3 good days before it all kicked off again.¬† I kept getting told “oh it’ll pass by 12 weeks” then 16 weeks, then 18 weeks.¬† Eventually they admitted that I had hyperemesis gravidarum or EXTREME morning sickness.¬† It lasted right up til the end of my 40 weeks and 2 days.¬† Good intentioned advice such as “you’ll have a healthy baby because being sick is a good sign your hormone levels are really high” did nothing to make me feel any better.¬† I often found myself thinking “well, I’ll trade places with you and then we’ll see if you still think it’s good being this sick!”

 

I ended up being referred to a consultant obstetrician for the sickness and due to the fact that I had contracted malaria 5 times in the past.¬† About¬†a week before we were due to fly to South Africa we had to come to the painful decision that because the safari park was in a malaria hotspot, and, if I got it again I could end up with a¬†stillborn child, and also because I was too sick to travel, that we would have to cancel that long awaited trip.¬† I was so heartbroken as we had wanted to do such a trip since getting married and we had booked it and thought we’d get one last big holiday just the two of us before any children came along if God did bless us with any.¬† I know there is a reason why God brought our baby into being at the moment He did and I know there’s a reason he made me so sick as to not be able to go on the trip at that time, but I must admit I did feel quite angry and upset, especially a the time rolled round when we should be boarding our flight and instead of jetting off across the world(I LOVE to travel)we were heading to Yorkshire to stay with family……the dreary winter weather is no competition for warmth and sunshine!

If the sickness was all that happened to me, it’d be enough, but I developed symphysis pubis disorder and ended up on crutches.¬† It bothered me to walk from my front door to the car, which is a very short distance indeed!¬† I also had placenta praevia, which thankfully around 36 weeks righted itself enough that it was no longer a real danger.¬† And on top of that I ended up with a heart condition which started around 25 weeks¬†called supraventricular tachycardia. My heart would race I’d feel dizzy and then faint.¬† It was the scariest thing ever.¬† We ended up in hospital quite a few times with it and I almost had an emergency c-section at 31 weeks as my baby’s heart rate dropped during one of my episodes, and my consultant wanted to end the pregnancy at 38 weeks.¬† I wasn’t allowed any medication for it as it would have slowed the baby’s heart rate down too much so near the end.

Through all this I felt like I was on an emotional rollercoaster.¬† Often¬†I felt no love for thing being growing inside of me that was¬†causing such trouble, then¬†I’d feel¬†guilty for not feeling love.¬† I went through fits of being angry with God wanting to know why He’d allowed me to go through such a horrible¬†ordeal when all¬†I wanted to do was enjoy being pregnant like my other friends who were¬†all due 4 weeks either side of me.¬†¬†God gave me the grace to get through to the end, He helped me to start to bond with my child before birth and to look forward to¬†that first cuddle with great excitement despite all the¬†troubles and ill health.¬†¬†He has also blessed me with a wonderful husband who encouraged me, cared for me, cared for the house and everything else so I could rest.¬† He’s given me a wonderful family who helped out practically as well.¬† So in the midst of¬†one of the greatest¬†trials of my life, He opened my eyes to the blessings around me, and¬†He used the time¬†and the troubles to teach me lessons I otherwise would’ve been too busy to learn.¬†¬†I¬†never wish to go through another 9 months like it, but it has shaped me¬†and taught me so much and for that I am thankful.¬† As a selfish human being I would have loved to have had an easy path, and, yes, often I was¬†jealous of my friends who were able to carry on as normal throughout their pregnancies and go out for a meal, go out walking etc etc, but God met me in the valley and¬†it was in that valley that He chose to bless me and teach me, so for that I must be forever grateful.¬† My road through pregnancy reminds me of the¬†lyrics of a Third Day song called Mountain of God which sums me and my experience up perfectly:

Thought that I was all alone Broken and afraid But You were there with me Yes, You were there with me
And I didn’t even know That I had lost my way But You were there with me Yes, You were there with me
‘Til You opened up my eyes I never knew That I couldn’t ever make it Without You
Even though the journey’s long And I know the road is hard Well, the One who’s gone before me He will help me carry on After all that I’ve been through Now I realize the truth That I must go through the valley To stand upon the mountain of God
As I travel on the road That You have lead me down You are here with me Yes, You are here with me I have need for nothing more Oh, now that I have found That You are here with me Yes, You are here with me
I confess from time to time I lose my way But You are always there To bring me back again
Sometimes I think of where it is I’ve come from And the things I’ve left behind But of all I’ve had, what I possessed Nothing can quite compare With what’s in front of me With what’s in front of me

Is there anypne else out there who’s gone through a similar pregnancy?¬† Or is there anyone going through such an ordeal currently and needs some encouragement?¬† Please let me know.